5 Lessons Our Wedding Taught Me
As a little girl I never dreamed about my wedding. I was too busy throwing backyard parties for the kids on the block, figuring how to make money for the corner store trips. By my adult years after many failed relationships, expectations never being met I resolved I would be the the single, fun auntie to my nieces and nephews. Fast forward to December 3, 2022 ya girl got engaged to my best friend, still remaining the fun auntie to my nieces and nephews. Some days I am still in shock of being a wife I love it here!
Neither my fiancé or I wanted a long engagement so we set a date, May 6th 2023 giving us six months to plan our most perfect day. For many years I had only heard of the wedding planning / day nightmares. Thankfully we didn’t experience any nightmares yet we did have a few bumps in the road none to ruin our day at all, definitely enough for me to share in this week’s blog.
Let’s get into the lessons:
Remember THIS IS YOUR DAY! Throughout our planning my father gave us the best advice. His words exactly, “Jee, this day is about you and EC! Do what yall want to do those are the only people who matter.” Listen throughout those six months we had to lean in REAL heavy to these words. At the altar it was as if we spoke with our eyes telling each other, “It’s our day, let’s enjoy it!!”
Choose Your Wedding Party Wisely -Choosing your wedding party is so important. The people you choose not only walk down the aisle with you they help you prepare for your day, celebrate you before the big day! Keep in mind you have will have bridal shower, bachelorette party, things to be purchased, etc. You want your entire wedding party to help make your day the most memorable day. These are the people who will stay in community with you hopefully throughout your married life. Choose your wedding party wisely.
Don’t be rushed! - My husband and I were really strategic in how we shared information cause why? It was OUR DAY! As soon as we got engaged the questions started, “When is the date?” “Are you having a big wedding” “What are your colors” “Where are you getting married” Whew Chile, I learned to smile let folks know in thee kindest way that we weren’t sharing that info. We shared the wedding details when we felt it was time, on our time. Don’t let people who aren’t paying for anything rush you, remember that!
Be prepared for the AUDACITY of others! - I clearly had no idea that folks will make YOUR day about THEM! Cause how in the world do people make a day that isn’t designed for them or about them make it about them. This is probably still a point that still has me in shock some two months later. You would think the day of the wedding at least the audacity would quiet down a bit. Nope that is when the audacity was at a ALL time HIGH! Babes, I promise I am still confusion.
Be Present- The preparation for our special day was such a blur. I was so excited to plan the wedding. Less than half way through the planning I started to feel so overwhelmed. Both my husband and I did an amazing job of having check-ins with each other. Making sure we were on the same page, talking through moments of being overwhelmed. On our BIG DAY before walking down the aisle I whispered to myself, “Stay Present.” Finally making it down the aisle seeing my husband the entire day we whispered to each other and ourselves, “Stay Present.”
When I look back at on our wedding day it was so beautiful. Filled with so many memories of our friends and family to celebrate our love publicly. These lessons aren’t limited to just wedding planning but life in general. It’s most definitely okay to be a bit selfish!
Girl Be You,
XOXO!