Throw Your List Away!

I remember it like it was yesterday 13 years ago, my 25th year birthday party. My friends and family showed up it was a great time. So many memories made with laughs, gifts, cards and taking so many pictures. During the party my mom says one line to me that has stayed with me all these years later.

“Jee, Happy Birthday enjoy this time life is going to go fly by now.”

I find myself quite often thinking back to this one line. It has in ways rushed me to accomplish life goals in other ways it has been the grounding words needed to enjoy this one life we are given. It literally feels like I have blinked my eyes and 13 years have sped past me. So many victories, so many heartbreaks, so many disappointments and so many thoughts of, “Where did the time go.”

In my first apartment I had turned my closet into a small prayer room. I wrote a list of all the things I wanted to accomplish by the time I was 30 years old. That list was my life bible to determine my levels of success. From day to day my emotions were always all over the place. It seemed nothing was happening on the list and time was escaping me from succeeding. I felt like a disappointment, a failure and truly missing out on the goals I dreamed for myself.

When I turned 30 only crossing off a few things on my list bringing me to more questions.

“I haven’t accomplished this list.”

“My life is over!”

“I don’t see how I can still have value not hitting the things on my list.”

“What do I do now?”

“What do I do next?”

“What could have done differently.”

The list was a holy grail as a place of success for me. Even after having the job that shaped so much of my future plans for my life. The list should never hold this much weight in your life, there must be room for the unexpected to happen in your life. It is beautiful to have a 5 year, 10 year goal for your life. Be open for the plans to change on the horizon of that change may be the most beautiful life you ever expected.

A few years after my 30 birthday, life brought about a settling in my heart to be attentive to the lessons that came through silence. I had spent trying not to let time pass me by that I didn’t take time to see the achievements I made that I didn’t write down. Future living cause me to miss on living in the present.

Some of the biggest moments of my life were overlooked instead of enjoying them. From buying my own car, building my resume that even now still leaves me in shock at the work I did, beating the odds of what I thought possible, actively destroying generational curses that’s just to name a few.

We live in a time when there is always more pressure to show up, hustle hard, focus on our future while never taking the time to honor our present.

I have to quietly remind myself every single day yes time does fly that’s why it’s important to choose things that bring peace. It’s important to not to waste time focusing on things that don’t inspire us, focusing on things that don’t grow us.

Do yourself a favor throw away your list. Live your life in the present. Extend grace to yourself live your life each moment with gratefulness!

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I Ain’t Code Switching No Mo’

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Tommy Ain’t Got No Job!